Some of our best family discussions happen around the camp fire. In between licking s’mores off our fingers, we share school experiences, summer wishes, and funny stories.
The next time you're around the campfire, why not talk about family giving?
Last weekend, we brought out our TableTopics cube of conversation starters and enjoyed the summer air while listening to each other answer questions such as “Would you rather meet your great grandparents or your great grandchildren?” “What is your family known for?” and “Is it more fun to be a parent or a child?”
When I came back to work on Monday and dove into creating content for our fall issue of Giving Forum, which will focus on family philanthropy, I thought of a few of my own family philanthropy conversation starters I could pull out next time we’re sitting around the campfire:
- If you had $1,000 dollars (which sounds like all the money in the world to a young child), and you could use it to change someone’s life, what would you do with it?
- Do you think it’s better to give the entire $1,000 to one person and make a really big difference or give $100 to 10 people and make less of a difference but affect more people?
- What is one problem now that you hope doesn’t exist in 10 years? 50 years?
- If you could make a movie about how to make the world a better place, what would your movie be like?
- When you do something really great, how important is it that others know what you did?
- If you could invent something that would make the world a better place, what would you invent?
West Central Initiative, an MCF member, brings the thought-provoking discussion from the camp fire to the kitchen table in its recent issue of FOCUS on the Region, a quarterly publication. Here’s an excerpt of Sheri Holm’s article:
Kitchen table philanthropy involving the whole family
The next time your family comes together for a day at the lake or a barbeque in the backyard, why not take an hour to discuss how your family can make an impact on the things that are most meaningful to all of you.
Some questions to pose to your ‘kitchen table philanthropists”:
1. First, let your family know that including charitable giving in your estate does not mean leaving out the children, grandchildren and other family members. Including charities in your planning can actually enhance what your loved ones will inherit. Because your family is important to you, their input into how those charitable dollars are spent and what organizations they will support is also important to you.
2.Encourage your family to talk about the charitable organizations they currently support. Ask each about the most satisfying charitable gift that they have made. Other questions could include:
- Do you see your family as a family who “gives back”? How do you feel about that?
- Are local issues and organizations more important to your family than national or international organizations?
- Are there projects or organizations you would like the family’s name linked with?
- What would the family like to see accomplished through charitable giving?
Including your loved ones in these discussions can provide multiple benefits. It gives them a role in your decision making. They will understand what you want to do and how you want to do it. It should also ensure that there will be no surprises for the family at the time your estate is settled.
If you’d like your conversation spurred on by techie gadgets, guess what? There’s an iPhone app that might just be up your alley. My colleague here at MCF, Cary Walski, found Picture Your Legacy, which guides you toward articulating what you’d like your legacy to be – in business, philanthropy or life – by selecting and sorting images that reflect what you want to accomplish in the world. “What does a dancer leaping across the stage, a redwood tree or a lighthouse beacon say about the funder you aspire to be?” reads the promotional text on the app’s website.
Once you go through the app’s exercises, you can email them to yourself and other family members for further reflection and discussion. So, if sitting around a campfire or the kitchen table together isn’t in the cards, now you can still share your philanthropy philosophy by way of the virtual kitchen table.
Join the conversation: What questions could you ask your kids to find out how they see themselves changing the world? What questions might help guide them to think philanthropically? Have you tried any kind of conversation starters to spark discussion about your family’s philanthropy? How will iPhone apps and other tech devices influence how families discuss their philanthropy and make decisions in lieu of sitting around the camp fire or the kitchen table?
- Chris Murakami Noonan, MCF communications associate
Posted by Chris Noonan 
